Understanding Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling

Couples therapy can help couples in all types of intimate relationships. Regardless of sexual orientation or marital status. Couples therapy pushes us to evolve. It helps us be self-aware, become aware of the other, and negotiate the differences. It’s supposed to be a learning curve.

Couples therapy is different from individual therapy.

In individual therapy, the therapist focuses on the individual. While in couples therapy, the focus is on the relationship. Each partner brings their own experience to the relationship. As a result, a “chemical reaction” occurs between partners. This chemistry forms the relationship. There is a strong link between the individual and the relationship. Thus, the quality of the relationship depends on the sense of self of each partner. For this reason, sometimes individual therapy is vital to improve self-awareness. It can be an effective way to complement couples therapy.

Marriage counseling helps partners recognize their contribution to the relationship as well as the strengths and difficulties in the relationship (the chemistry). The couples therapist will listen to each partner and brainstorm research-based strategies. By doing so, they can learn more about themselves and reach their goal for the relationship. It is essential that each partner be open to new ideas and to change themselves.

Why do couples seek therapy?

Couples often seek therapy to make educated, thoughtful decisions about rebuilding and strengthening their relationship. Or, deciding when to go their separate ways.

How long does couples therapy last?

Couples therapy is often short to mid-term. This is depending on the challenges and goals addressed. Plus, the couple’s commitment to the process. Sometimes, one or both partners may be referred to do brief individual therapy. This occurs to boost the couples therapy process. Each couple is unique, and the specific therapy plan will depend on the couple’s goals.

Our approach to Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling in West Des Moines, IA

At the Relationship & Intimacy Center, we offer an integrated approach to couples therapy. Joseli Alves-Dunkerson works with the Gottman, EFT, and Imago approaches. She is also a certified sex therapist on a national scale. Larissa Bustamante specializes in LGBTQ+ couples. She uses the Gottman approach as well as EMDR for trauma. Larissa is also experienced in working with partners who have ADHD, and open relationships.

What happens during couples therapy?

At the first session, the couple will share their reasons for seeking counseling. Here, they will also discuss the specific goals each partner has for therapy. After the first session, the therapist will meet once with each of the partners one-on-one. This occurs to be sure the couple’s therapist learned as much as possible about each partner. In the fourth session, the therapist will meet with the couple together again. Then, they will share what they learned about the couple’s relationship. The couples therapist may recommend a more complete online assessment during this time.

At the Center, there is some homework or home play between sessions. We do this so that the momentum keeps going in therapy. Videos, audiobooks, books, among others, will be shared via our confidential mail server. Couples tend to enjoy these activities at home.

Couples therapy and marriage counseling involve partners learning how to identify and express their needs to each other in an effective way. Thus, helping manage conflict as it arises. Emotional and physical intimacy are also addressed.

Begin Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling in West Des Moines, IA

1. Contact us online, either to ask a question or set an appointment. 
2. Start couples therapy, and gain peace of mind!